My last post was basically a link to a really good question my buddy Kevin had. After giving it some thought, I still don't have an answer for him, but I do have even more questions. Kevin's question re: feeding gremlins was this:
Now, technically isn't it always after "midnight"? 11:59pm is after midnight of the same day. What gives man?
My additional questions cover all three Gremlin rules.
Rule Number One: Keep them out of daylight.
What is it about the sunlight that burns them to a crisp? Can they use a tanning bed? What if they put on HELLA' sunscreen? Or does that count as breaking rule #2?
Rule Number Two: Never get them wet.
We've seen what happens if you get water on them. Let's say you feed your Mogwai an apple. What if juice sprays on it's eyelid? (Don't laugh - it's happened to me.) Or, let's say someone sneezes in it's face - are we all f-cked? Can its own drool activate the birthing process?
What happens if you pee on them? Same thing (only stinky)? Or do you create a new kind of gremlin? And what if they pee on themselves? (Don't laugh - it's happened to me.)
Rule Number Three: Never, ever, feed them after midnight.
The big question here - Time Zones. If I put a Mogwai on a 5 hour flight from Boston to California that leaves Boston at 9, but arrives in Cali at 11 - am I safe to feed it when it arrives? (And, in a related question - can my gremlin fly carry-on like a small dog, or do I have to stow him with the other animals?)
Finally, when do astronaughts feed their gremlins if they take them to space?
Please. Take some time to think it over and answer my questions. Especially if you're that crazy old chinese guy with the long beard and the pipe.
If I remember correctly, some of these questions are actually addressed in "Gremlins 2," which seems like it was made solely to destroy the cult credibility of the first film.
Sadly, I saw it in the theater... and on video. And I had the Underoos, even though I was in high school.
Posted by: Deadpan | January 17, 2007 at 11:36 AM